Smokin' Hot Muffins

There's been a couple of times in my life where I've stopped, waited a moment before breathing slowly, evaluating and wondering if that exact moment is the reason I was put on this planet. Today, on one of the more hungover Sunday's of my life, I had one of those moments as I unapologetically plunged my teeth into these delectable little cheesy, salty, carby muffin-shaped dreamboats.

Yesterday evening held a party to celebrate my brother's twenty second birthday and it's safe to say I entirely underestimated the coma-inducing powers of the heady combination of Champagne and Pimms. This subsequently led to me waking up today and really fancying a litre of orange juice (or perhaps more, it's often tricky to determine an amount to drink during a raging thirst) and that perfect comfort food. The sort of food I could eat all day long and feel no regret about, because hey…I'm just feeling that fragile.

These gorgeous savoury muffins, called smokin' hot for there attractive qualities/smoked ingredients rather than any spice, are just perfect for everything I needed today and I can imagine they would be just right for most other, less groggy, days too. With almost the same amount of Smoked Applewood cheese as there is muffin mix and a gorgeous lashing of buttery cooked onions and smoked ham…these are a meal, a treat or whatever you may need on any given day. They're mouldable, adaptable, footloose and fanciful.

I've always had a soft spot for savoury muffins, in amongst my various amorous feelings towards anything sweet, as they can be perfect with baked beans and cheese, or cold as an on the go snack or warm, as a savoury breakfast. Back when I was a student, they would feed me all week. A treat that's tough to beat.

This recipe makes twelve muffins and one way or another they should last you a week or even a little longer. Those figures are taking for granted that fact that no one else also begins tucking into them, which although seems improbable, I suppose may happen in some world, somewhere…someday.

The other nice thing about these muffins is that the ingredients are interchangeable. All you really need for life is a really, really good basic muffin recipe and you can experiment from there. Just ensure that if you do trade in or out, that it is for like-for-like ingredients, both in their texture or consistency.

So, if you too are suffering today then I hope I've talked you into making these relatively mess-free, simple and quick-to-make little muffins. I promise that they'll hug you from the inside, comfort you, listen to all your problems and make it all better, pretty quickly, on an intermittently overcast Sunday such as today.

Recipe


Ingredients:

• 50g butter
• 2 small onions, finely chopped
• 360g plain flour
• 2 1/2 tsp baking powder
• 250g Smoked Applewood cheese
• 250ml whole milk
• 1 large egg
• 80g smoked ham or smoked bacon

Method:

1. Firstly, preheat your oven to 170 degrees (based on a fan assisted oven) before heating the 50g of butter in a frying plan. Once entirely melted, cook off your onions. (I added a few splashes of Lea & Perrins, Tabasco Sauce and a pinch of pepper and salt to mine too, for a little added flavour. Lea & Perrins always makes most aspects of life a lot better.) Leave this to one side, off the heat, once cooked.
2. Mix together the flour, baking powder, whole milk, egg and cheese in a mixing bowl. This does form a peculiarly thick consistency, but don't be put off. Once baked, the muffins don't really expand, so this mixture is quite dense to start with so you can fill a muffin case with it, without fear of it spilling out over the edge as it cooks. 
3. Pour in to your mixing bowl, your prepared onions and thinly sliced smoked ham or bacon, dependant on your preference, and stir into your mixture using a wooden spoon, until fully combined. 
4. Spoon this mixture into your prepared muffin cases and bake, on a muffin tray, for approximately  25 minutes. 
5. Ensure that your muffins are cooked all the way through using a skewer (if any muffin mix comes out on the skewer, then you will need to cook them for a little longer. Try to do this in intervals of no longer than five minutes, as burning these muffins would be a total tragedy) and if they are completely cooked then leave to cool a little. Be sure not to leave them to cool entirely as these little muffins really are quite amazing when still warm. 
6. Sit down, eat, rehydrate, recuperate, be happy living in that one amazingly tasty moment. Repeat.

I hope you love these little muffins as much as I do, however should you happen to try any alternative ingredients then let me know how you get on and about anything that REALLY works. I'm always keen to try something savoury and wonderful.

Happy Sunday to you all!

Sweet Strawberry Shake

Stop what you're doing, I've sussed it. Here is it, the ultimate, insanely perfect, impossibly wondrous (AND SPOOKILY HEALTHY) strawberry milkshake. That's by anyone standards. Beauty is in the eye of the mason jar holder.

Wherever you are look up your nearest supermarket, head to it and buy the following ingredients (if you are somewhere strange and horrid, such as in a forest or on holiday somewhere that doesn't offer WiFi or 3G then, I hate to break it to you, but you're going to have to use a map and compass and get walking. It's worth returning to the old-age methods of travel for.)

Ingredients:

1 cup of frozen strawberries
5 pitted dates
1 dessert spoon of manuka honey
Almond milk to the max line, if using a nutribullet (if not, it's approx 200ml)
2 Tsp of strawberry Nesquick (optional. A baddy, but a goody)

Whizz up, pop in a pretty glass, decorate how you wish (or don't bother if the anticipation becomes too strong. You can find what I did with mine below: the milkshake, old fashioned paper straw and a slice of strawberry on top, all served in a mason jar. Ladies love mason jars) and enjoy, preferably in your favourite sunny spot in the garden.

It's thick, sweet and with a heavenly natural taste of proper, Somerset-grown (depending on where you hail from) strawberries.

Hello, British Summertime. As always, we're angry you left us for so long but we must forgive you, as we have of course all missed you so much and we love you even more.